|
Silly Riddles... Q: What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter? A: A hole Q: What has no beginning, end, or middle? A: A doughnut Q: What is the centre of gravity, start vortexes, and can be in El Salvador? A: The letter "V" Q: Where is a vampire's favourite place to swim? A: In lake eerie! Q: Where can't you sent a dog? A: A flea market Q: What kind of shampoo do you use on a dog? A: Chompppp-ooooo! Q: What goes down but never comes up? A: rain Q: What instrument uses a lot of power? A: Electric Guitar Q: What is the fastest thing on Earth? A: light Q: What animal has four legs and cannot walk? A: A dead animal Q: What does a ghost eat? A:Boo berries Q: If you turn noon upside down what will the word be? A: It will stay the same Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To show he was not a chicken Silly Riddles Q: How do we know that cars are in the New Testament?
A: Because Jesus was a car painter!(carpenter)
Q: Where do you find rain gear in the Bible?
A: On the book of Goloshes. (Colossians).
Q: How do you study the Bible?
A: You Luke into it.
Q: How do we know that Jesus used fertilizer?
A: Because he said, "Lettuce spray." (Let us pray).
Q: How do we know that Jesus made coffee?
A: It says so in the book of He Brews. (Hebrews).
Q: Who were the three shortest men in the Bible?
A: Bildad the shoe-height, Knee-high Miah, and the man who fell asleep On His Watch.
Q: Where did the murderer hide his weapon in the Bible?
A: In the Book of Axe. (Acts).
Q: How do you know when Enoch is at the door?
A: 'E knocks.
Q: What's the first Supreme Court case in the Bible?
A: Joshua Judges Ruth. (Joshua, Judges, Ruth). Q: What did King James Bible say to King James?
A: I have more pages than you!
Little Bobby: Mom, why was nothing said about the other persons that Jesus raised from the dead together with Lazarus?
Mom: Oh dear, now were did you learn that there were other persons? It was only Lazarus.
Little Bobby: But mom, every time I read that verse I cannot help but assume that there were at least four persons.
Mom: Now why would you assume something like that?
Little Bobby: 'Cause Lazarus came fourth (forth)!
Some men were discussing the Bible. They were wondering how many apples Adam and Eve ate in the Garden of Eden.
First man: I think there was only one apple in the Garden.
Second man: I think there were ten apples. Adam 8 and Eve ate 2.
Third man: I think there were sixteen apples. Eve 8 and Adam 8 also.
Fourth man: I think all three of you are wrong. If Eve 8 and Adam 82, that would be a total of 90 apples.
Fifth man: You guys don't know how to add at all. According to history, Eve 81 and Adam 82. That would be a total of 163 apples.
Sixth man: Wait a minute! If Eve 81 and Adam 812, that would make a total of 893 apples.
Seventh man: None of you guys understand the problem in the slightest. According to my figuring, if Eve 814 Adam and Adam 8124 Eve, that would be a total of 8,938 apples in the garden.
At that point all of the men gave up.
Q. How long did Cain hate his brother?
A. As long as he was Abel.
Q. At what time of day was Adam created?
A. A little before Eve.
Q. Why should we be encouraged by the story of Jonah and the whale?
A. Because Jonah was down in the mouth, but came out all right.
Q. Did Eve never have a date with Adam?
A. No, it was an apple.
Q. When was the first meat mentioned in the Bible?
A. When Noah took Ham into the ark.
Q. Why was the woman in the Bible turned into a pillar of salt?
A. Because she was dissatisfied with her lot.
Q. On the Ark, Noah probably got milk from the cows. What did he get from the ducks?
A. Quackers.
Q. Where is the first math problem mentioned in the Bible?
A. When God told Adam and Eve to go forth and multiply.
Q. Why did Noah have to punish and discipline the chickens on the Ark?
A. Because they were using "fowl" language.
Q. How do we know that the disciples were very cruel to the corn?
A. Because they pulled its ears.
Q. Which animal on Noah's Ark had the highest level of intelligence?
A. The giraffe.
******************************************************************************************** What do elves learn in school? Answer: The elf abet What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? Answer: The Christmas alphabet has no L (Noel) What Christmas Carol is a favorite of parents? Answer: Silent Night Why does Santa have 3 gardens? Answer: so he can Hoe, Hoe, Hoe . What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Answer: Frosted flakes What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Answer: Frostbite What does a cat on the beach have in common with Christmas? Answer: Sandy claws What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit? Answer: Crisp Cringle What kind of candle burns longer, a red candle or a green candle? Answer: neither candles always burn shorter. Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Answer: they had low elf esteem. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Answer: claustrophobic ***************************************************************************************** Silly RiddlesA man was driving a black truck. His lights were not on. The moon was not out. A lady was crossing the street. How did the man see her?
Answer: It was a bright, sunny day
Can you read the following? Yy u r yy u b I c u r yy 4 me.
Answer: Too wise you are, too wise you be, I see you are too wise for me.
Do you say, "Nine and five is thirteen," or "Nine and five are thirteen" ?
Answer: Neither. Nine and five are fourteen
How can you tell the difference between a can of chicken soup and a can of tomato soup?
Answer: Read the label.
How can you tell twin witches apart?
Answer: It's not easy to tell which witch is which.
How did the man feel when he got a big bill from the electric company?
Answer: He was shocked.
How do pigs write?
Answer: With a pigpen
How does a boat show affection?
Answer: It hugs the shore.
How many animals did Moses take on the ark?
Answer: Moses didn't take anything on the ark. Noah did!
If a boy is spanked by his mother and his father, who hurts the most?
Answer: The boy.
|
Riddles